10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

Most of the time, people will defend their point of view. Even if they are wrong, their emotions will get in the way more than they should. We all come from a place and have our own perspectives, but we are wrong sometimes. Some people will just disagree to disagree, and others will agree to disagree. The more we are at odds with each other, the more we cause problems. Although people are full of crap, we still need to find better ways to have our differences. However, there are 10 ways to be less abrasive.

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Unfortunately, these problems are what we should go through and are created by the fact that there are just too many variables. We are meant to learn from these experiences, and it is why we even have this thing called civilization. Abrasion is part of the animal condition, but we certainly have found ways to mitigate it. There are so many things to add, but so many of those ways seem useless. There are always better ways to agree and disagree that do not end in blood shed. Regardless, these are the 10 amazing ways to be less abrasive.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

1. Learning

The more you learn, the more you open yourself to new understandings. If you keep yourself closed in and dumb, you will find little in the world that makes much sense. The more ignorant you are, the more you are probably willing to disagree with someone over something stupid. Going out and reading a book or learning a new trade can keep you in line with reality and accepting it. The downside is that even though we think we are agreeing sometimes, we are not on the same page.

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Now, learning can create abrasion as well, considering you may be arguing with some ignorance. Fortunately, you will learn how to agree and disagree properly, even if it creates some pain. The more you learn, the more you can teach someone else in the end. This is the ultimate lesson to learn here, and if someone is wrong, they are worth the disagreement. If someone is simply telling you that you are being abrasive, they may or may not have a point.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

2. Sociality

There are benefits of both socially isolation and being a social butterfly. Learning how to communicate and agree is great, but it is also good to avoid being around others. There is generally a good mix between the two that gives you the best of both worlds. Doing them in extremes is also beneficial, as you can simply avoid people or get as much talking practice in as possible.

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There’s a good balance, but you generally have to be around people and talking with them for this to count. If you are around people all of the time though, you can end up becoming burnt out and irritated. If you limit yourself reasonably, you can find a way, at least to some degree, to be less antagonistic. Since there is no perfect solution considering it is a problem, you will have to just live with it.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

3. Questioning

Learning to question may seem counterintuitive, but it can also be beneficial. Most of what is mentioned here is not one size fits all when it comes to how it is beneficial. While some belligerence is okay, you do not want it all of time. It is a matter of doing it when you have to while mitigating the rest of the excess. If someone says something stupid or you are just not feeling it that day, question yourself.

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Make sure that you are not doing something for the wrong reason, and be sure to do it right. This is another thing you should learn, but it deserves it’s own little category. It is a simple as saying it, even if it feels like it needs more explanation. Taking it too far is when this becomes self-defeating, but who am I to say that this is enough. While certain things can help, they do not always help in every way.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

4. Mental Health

Keeping track of your stress levels and mental health is highly important to keeping yourself agreeable. Moods play a big role in your decision making processes, but they should avoid impacting you too negatively. It is not to say that you should always be agreeable, but it is the best tool to convince someone. Having more stress because of a disagreement never did anyone any good. This can create cognitive dissonance, and this dissonance can create problems like narcissism.

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This means that you should avoid being defensive when it proves right. Remember, this is about you learning how to avoid abrasion, but this goes for others as well. In every circumstance, considering where you are mentally is always important, even if comes down to a physical problem. Being too much of a hermit will not necessarily help you with others if it is making you crazy. Insanity is the last thing you need, an it starts with a little bit of self-awareness.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

5. Dealing With it

This means that when you deal with it, you will end up learning from it by getting used to it. The question to always ask is why are you dealing with this to begin with. The problem here is that this is the exact opposite thought you should have when attempting practicality. It never does too much good in being too hard in yourself, as it serves a negating function. Making sure to be healthy in body and mind is certainly some easy but useful advice.

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If you deal with loss, you will end up learning something by coping with it. It is not always the best thing to do, and you should certainly avoid doing it intentionally. However, you should go outside of your comfort zone at least a little bit to challenge your sensibilities. The more you have under your belt (even if it is the abuse you dealt with) the more you should take advantage of it. That is where learning and working with yourself in tandem with all of these rules makes a difference.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

6. Avoid Victimization

We are a group species meant to thrive on living together in close proximity. Since we essentially own the entire world, there are little tribes called countries with people everywhere. Other animals do it as well, but some specie live on their own. Even though we are a group, we end up lying to each other and causing each other problems. You need to avoid victimizing yourself and others, including be the victim of someone else’s problems.

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This is easier said than done, as it does no good to keep this harrowing cycle up. Invalidation is the key component here, and it can create all sorts of issue. If you have any control whatsoever, you should do your best to avoid it, as you can end up causing the same issue. The more we are exposed to this form of abuse or even self-abuse, the more we are likely to cause belligerence. It is not all on you, but this is meant to be said to everyone. This is the last thing we need when are at least just trying to get along.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

7. Sense of Humor

Unless you find having a sense of humor an abrasive trait, it can truly come in handy here. Although, even though we all learn from our experiences, it will never be enough. I can even tell you that you can learn the best ways to avoid being abrasive with a joke about simply reading this article. Giving yourself the time and ability to think more correctly is key. If you cannot find a way to laugh it off, then you may end up biting off more than you can chew.

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The same way people avoid singing out of ridicule, people avoid humor out of discomfort. Creating a lighthearted tone for yourself and others can help everyone in a standoffish situation. If you avoid it to begin with, which you should, you can avoid an argument. There are better ways to disagree, even if someone deserves a harsh punchline. In the end, it is about everyone coming out of circumstance alive and well. Even if argument is necessary, we are all trying to at least be a little bit nicer.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

8. Be Subtle

As humans, we can all work in tandem with one another, but we can always do better. The issue I have with this is that we are simply not trying and making too many mistakes. This is part of human nature, and it sucks, but most of us are lazy without proper motivation. Even if we work hard, we still will not succeed in reaching perfection. Learning how to subtly disagree is very important, at least when responding to someone else’s crap. Just because you got through it, does not mean that it is okay to go through. It just happened to be what happened, unfortunately.

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Also, learning to agree and how to disagree with class is always something worth giving a try. Whatever the situation may be, there are better ways to make your point and send your message. The same thing goes for telling the truth; it does not always have to be so harsh. Even if you choose to disagree with your contrarian mentality, you can come off as reasonable to the misinformed. You do not have to be dishonest when you can just avoid the brutal nature of your emotions.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

9. Low Expectations

Just because it is hard to do does not mean that you should not do it. Most of the time, we may laze about and decide to keep our lives simple and easy. Even if we are not doing something does not mean that we should not. Struggle is the nature of existence, but it does not mean that we should make it worse. We all think we deserve better, and setting these expectations can be dire. It is not much different from someone finding significance with a number, but the only thing significant is what they mentally created.

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Evading the truth is also the last thing you want to do when trying to get along with the right people. Of course, things like having a good diet and exercise can help, these things are a given. I could also tell you to just be less abrasive, but this would not be good advice. Although having low expectations can seem rough, it really only sets you up for more positive anticipation. While a lot of this advice may seem vague, shortsighted, and useless, the obvious is not always easy without motivation and perspective.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

10. Be Personable

Life is the journey, but the journey is where a lot of the struggle and abrasion come from. This goes to show that it will all be over soon and we will ultimately be okay in the end. Even though this is not necessarily true, it helps a lot of people cope through their existence. If you are abrasive and are trying to convince someone else of something, making it personal always helps. Even though we all want to convince ourselves of some sort of magic, we are always looking for the next best thing.

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You should not get personal is come condescending way, but the least you can do is try to relate. It is a great way for an abrasive person to get away with all kinds of abrasion, too. As long as you can avoid needless disagreement, you are getting the job done right. There is nothing better than convincing people with finetuned wordplay. Most people are even confused by their own words, but getting lost does little for the overall cause.

10 Ways to Be Less Abrasive

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Godspeed