The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
Allow me to preface this with an undeniable statement: There is no one way to celebrate the holiday season. There are, in fact, numerous ways to do this, and many of them do not take much thought to perform with perfection. Nevertheless, if you want the best ways to create a festive environment, then trying should be written off of this terrifying or rationalizing shitlist. It doesn’t even have to be that difficult! Although, with this in mind, there are no shortage of ways to make the holiday, be it Christmas, Thanksgiving, or Halloween, a special time for everyone. Even if you’re the only one about, you do not have to feel alone; you can make sure to implement all of these fantastic ideas. With this out of the way, these are the 10 amazing ways to celebrate the holidays with a furious, undying passion.
—
When it comes to the holiday season, it’s all about giving people, whom you barely know, something special. You can even give people something that makes them hate your guts, as the gift worth giving during the holiday season is not a gift worth giving at all.
The Gift Giver
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
1. Stay By Yourself
When it comes to the holiday season, there is no denying that it can be a depressing time. The stress is through the roof, and there are no hopes of driving down that street of ice while intoxicated. If that wasn’t enough, then understanding how other people can ruin it makes it even harder to swallow. In fact, people are lost, hopeless, and full of spiteful hatred towards their unpleasant peers, wishing that something good will happen next. Unfortunately, the holidays are not just there to take from others, so why not give yourself something as well. Who needs other people anyway, as they are just there to get in the way of your fun time by yourself. Of course, not only will you be able to do whatever you want, but you will also not have to worry about pleasing someone else. What else can you ask for?
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
2. Drink Too Much
If there is any time to drink and get lousy, then the holiday season creates a perfect excuse for your irresponsible habits. Most people will not care anyway, and you will fit in with the rest of your enablers while talking about the perfect philosophies. Furthermore, when it comes to your choice of beverages, you can obviously choose from a bevy of options. There are no judgements either, as the desire for irresistible pleasantries becomes the main course. “What kind of intoxicants may I indulge in?” you politely ask. Well, there are plenty, and leaning over the sofa after washing it down with ten hotdogs is part of the fun. Not only can you mix “it” with eggnog, but you can justify your horrible drinking decisions in front of your friends. Afterall, your family will be none the wiser, at least for the time being.
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
3. Buy Yourself Something
Even if you think that giving people something is part of the holiday season, you cannot deny the desire for self-indulgence. When the party comes by, things may become fun, but far too many people want the easy way out — relying on other people. However, instead of leaving yourself to the wolves that care little about you, there are ways to keep things simple. Of course, you may not get as many gifts, but at least you will not be wasting your time opening a present that includes the latest holiday sweatshirt. Nor will you have to have those awkward conversations with those nobodies whom you see only as an excuse just once a year. In the end, you can keep to yourself while also keeping the lights off to scare away the children so that you can keep yourself fairly sane. In fact, it’s the only way to be very frugal!
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
4. Go Undercover
It’s not even considered a holiday season without the sight of other people, but who’s to say that you have to avoid them entirely. In fact, just like a predator trying to study its prey, you can go out amongst the crowd to see how the unqualified tick. Their quirks are quite the sight to behold! If anything, you may even find out how to be normal, and why not allow that to be something gained through this harrowing experience. When push comes to shove though, you can push others away or keep trudging along your lonely path. There’s nothing really worth it out there anyway, and learning how to interact will only teach you how to avoid them, i.e., Black Friday. Thankfully, going undercover and incognito will provide you with plenty of entertainment that will teach you a lot of valuable lessons about “humanity.”
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
5. Pig Out
Just like when you’re trying to be by yourself, you can find reasons to eat a lot of food without a need for the sheep’s clothing. Although, after some time, you will want to hide yourself, as the holiday season is the perfect time to get fat. Who doesn’t want to do that? Well, no one, as just about everyone you talk with is someone who loves to eat way too much grub. Unfortunately, there’s only so much food to go around, and who wants to have others watch you as you pig out. No one! That’s who! However, this is already perfectly set up for us, and just about everyone does this in private already. So, what about Halloween? Well, you could just hoard the candy that you bought. And Thanksgiving? Hah, well it’s the only way to eat that entire turkey that you don’t want to cook. Also, what about Christmas?
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
6. Become the Grinch
Other than becoming overweight and gaining everything for yourself, you can simply impersonate Santa Claus. Afterall, you can do this by yourself, and it’s also part of the reason why you are by yourself to begin with. What makes this so fun is that you can actually eat everyone’s cookies, as they left them out. If this sounds like too much of a drag though, then you can simply go in and steal everyone’s Christmas spirit the harder way. People may call it shoplifting, but it’s never a better way than to take all of that credit for yourself. After all is said and done, you can even change your mind and give the toys back to regain your street credit. The people whom you stole from may even decide that you are their personal savior. Well, at least after you told them that you defeated the guy who destroyed Christmas.
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
7. Host a Party
It almost defeats the point of having fun, but you can be one of those special people who hosts a holiday party. Of course, it can be a Halloween, Thanksgiving, or Christmas themed party; however, why not have all three. If you’re feeling extra grandiose, then you can host all three at once, making the fun times even more exemplary. This way, you can get them all out of the way at once and not have to think about it again until next year. Why would you do this? Well, it’s because partying is a huge waste of time that is better spent in a small concentration of time. However, it may seem like a huge pain in the butt, but there are several ways to make this happen. You can even send invites out through social media to make it even easier to disappoint your fellow partygoers. I mean, how else would you have a party make sense?
—
Honorable Mentions: Kill the Easter Bunny, Destroy the North Pole, Turn into a Caveman, Go into Outer Space, Commit Adultery, Light Yourself on Fire (instead of hanging lights), Go Back in Time, Allow Yourself to Get Eaten By a Bear, Think About Everything but Yourself (or just yourself), Leave Yourself Alone, Vote for Trump, Overrule the Government, Create Anarchy, and Bitch at Your Parents
—
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
8. Go to People’s Houses
This is what the holiday season is all about, and there’s nothing wrong with making this wish come true, right? Well, it depends, but it may not be what you expect. Although, for the most part, there are plenty of depends to go around. In fact, there are nursing homes that you can terrorize, and people love the time of year for Christmas carols. If this sounds a little too meek, then you can go around asking for candy or steal it from their front porches. When you’re feeling a little more risqué, you can wait a month and waltz into people’s houses and join them for Thanksgiving dinner. After a little time has passed, there is even an open opportunity — the best opportunity — to stroll into people’s houses and steal their presents. However, to make it all even better, you can even use this time to scare the crap out of them.
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
9. Leave Your Loved Ones Behind
Just like when you decided to steal everyone’s candy during Halloween as the Grinch, you can leave everyone behind. In fact, the holiday season is a perfect time to leave your lovers crying with the winter blues. Isn’t that what the holidays are for? Anyway, there will be a time when it is all over, and why leave them with excruciating memories to cherish. If anything, you’d be doing them a favor to betray them and make them hate your guts. After all of this, you best go hide in the woods for them to find you several years later (after your sabbatical). Furthermore, there is room to invite your friends from the dark web to make the enjoyment that much more obvious. In the end, even though the pain of it all may hurt significantly, you’re doing yourself a favor. Your family couldn’t care less about it anyway.
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
10. Create a New Holiday
If all else fails, there is always room for you to create your own holiday, or better yet, you can institutionalize your own holiday season. As we all know, most holidays are made up anyway, and it will do the world some justice to change it up. Of course, you can do whatever you want to do, but the point is to play it simple. You can even follow the draconian rules that you have created or call it a new holiday by simply ignoring the pleas to keep everything the same. However, if this sounds like too much control to have, then there is always room to have someone tag along. Afterall, the holidays is all about putting up with the ones who you are supposed to care about. To make this even better though, you can change when the holiday season is or simply make every day a new holiday by saying screw it to everyone.
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
Ending
As you can see, there are plenty of ways to celebrate the so-called “holiday season,” but why choose only one way to get the party started. However, if you could only go one way this season, which way would you choose? Regardless, the point is to at least try to tolerate and be around your loved ones, which should be everyone, right? With this in mind, you should never have high expectations, give everyone plenty of lovely kisses, and leave them wanting a lot more, which includes savoring more of your loveliness for the next year. Afterall, it’s more about the gift of giving, and ever wanting to have anything more is simply too much to take for granted. However, in the end, you will always get something as long as everyone else is giving something. For that matter, this even ends up making it about receiving as well.
—
It doesn’t even have to be a gift, at least as long as you can call a poisonous apple, leftover thanksgiving dinner, or a lump of coal a special gift or glorious giving. Regardless, you might as well simply get ready for the new year, as everyone is waiting for it to happen again.
Ebenezer Splooge
The 10 Ways to Celebrate the Holiday Season
Article Page: https://www.creatorconquer.com/bloggers-paradise/
Godspeed
