You’ve probably heard about the latest and greatest diet around. It’s not that you won’t if you haven’t yet though. This is because a new fad diet looking to confuse the minds of the uneducated on to their new scam is around every corner. The scheme is often backed by “bro science” — a kind of science involving little to no verifiable fact put into layman terms based on misinformation. If anything, I’m giving you a list of diets you never knew about and wouldn’t try anyway. Don’t get any funny ideas! These are some of the worst fad diets to follow.
Clay Diet
You want to lose weight, but have trouble curbing those hunger pangs? Then put some dirt in your water. Your problem is solved! This is at least according to the advocates of the clay diet. The idea is that bentonite clay — a super-absorbent volcanic ash — will remove toxins and heavy metals from your body. Upon ingestion, the clay swells up to twelve times its size and pushes out slow-moving waste in the gut, boosting your metabolism. You can find clay pills on the market, too. The main selling point is weight loss. Want to lose ten pounds in twelve days? Sign me up, right?
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Slow down. Dr Anton Emmanuel, a gastroenterologist at University College Hospital, London, says: “The clay acts as a resin and binds everything — both good and bad — making it harder for the body to digest vital nutrients such as iron and calcium.” Eating clay can also perforate your bowels and cause heart and kidney failure.
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People love the word “detox.” Did you know the body detoxes itself? Your liver and kidneys do it all day long. If you want to curb hunger, have a snack rich in protein and fiber – like fruits, vegetables, or nuts. Time and portion your snacks so that you don’t overeat, but no need to go hungry. Just don’t eat dirt.
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Did you know that air is full of nutrients and is absolutely filling? Neither did I. It’s not, it’s a lie. The air diet, or the virtual eating diet, is a French-inspired, and yes, celebrity-endorsed, plan in which – you guessed it – you eat nothing. Instead, you take a forkful of real, actual, edible food, put it to your mouth, but you don’t eat it. Don’t do it! Simply breath in its aroma, and imagine it swishing around in your mouth — then swallow. Apparently, your brain is not very smart, because you’re full now. Have a nice day! You are allowed to drink soup — that is, water mixed with salt.
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Which is how this diet works. Supposedly, by going through the motions, you are satisfied. We don’t need to convince you why this could be detrimental to your health. It could create a fear of food, bring your metabolism to a dead halt and break your muscles down. What’s the healthy alternative here? Eating is the healthy alternative! There’s so much good, delicious, healthy, nutritious food out there just waiting for you to scarf it down and lose weight at the same time. Eat lots of plants, and you’ll be fine. No matter who you are, food is always good.
Tapeworm Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
A tapeworm is a flat, segmented worm that lives in your intestines. It can grow up to 55 feet long, live for 25 years, and have babies of its own while growing inside of you. You’re probably confused — this is a diet, right?
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For the tapeworm diet, you ingest a pill that contains a tapeworm egg. The egg will hatch and a tapeworm will grow inside of you, eating whatever you eat. In theory, it eats all of your calories away. Never mind that a tapeworm is a parasite; it is not your friend. The tapeworm doesn’t always limit itself to your digestive tract–it can travel all over the body. It can cause pain, diarrhea, nausea, fever, allergic reactions, infection, disruption of critical organs, blockage of bile and pancreatic ducts, and neurocysticercosis — which may lead to dementia and vision issues.
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Over the years, people have ingested tapeworms to shed pounds. It was actually a popular diet in the Victorian era but continues in some cultures today. Thankfully, there are no celebrity endorsements for this diet, but many women did admit they would swallow a tapeworm to lose weight on the diet. Want to eat fewer calories? No problem, fruits and vegetables are great options. You could eat ten cups of broccoli for only three hundred calories. Don’t eat a tapeworm!
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“You don’t need a doctor to tell you that ingesting a tapeworm is a bad idea,” Ochner says. Apparently, some people do. This weight-loss tactic has been around for decades, preying on especially desperate dieters. Here’s how it goes: Ingest tapeworm eggs, let the tapeworm eat the food you consume once it gets to your intestines, and then, when you lose enough weight, get a doctor to prescribe you an anti-worm medication. However, some tapeworm eggs can migrate to various parts of your body or cause other potentially life-threatening problems. Freaked out yet? Good!
Cookie Diet
It pains me to know that there is a cookie diet in this world and that it doesn’t work. I could really use it in my life. All you have to do for this diet is eat four to six cookies a day. Not just any cookies, mind you (sorry). These are high-protein, high-fiber cookies infused with nutrients. Some versions of the diet then allow you to eat any other meal of your choice once a day, for a total of about 1100 calories per day. That’s the high range for these cookie diets, by the way. Many are lower than 800 per day.
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I’m not a big fans of low-calorie diets. The fact is, you’ll lose weight if you eat nothing but a bag of marshmallows every day, but your muscle will all turn to fat and flab and you’ll feel really sick. I want you to eat healthy, wholesome, real food, packed with fresh fruits, vegetables, and grains. You can eat even cookies from time to time.
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Dr. Siegal’s Cookie Diet, The Hollywood Cookie Diet, and the Smart for Life Cookie Diet all promise that eating cookies will help you drop pounds. Of course, you don’t get to chow down chocolate-chip cookies — you eat about 500 to 600 calories a day from high-protein and high-fiber weight-loss cookies (one cookie company even makes the cookies from egg and milk protein) for breakfast, lunch and any snacks. Then you eat a normal dinner, for a total of 1,000 to 1,200 calories a day. If you stick to the diet, you will likely lose some weight, but by depriving yourself all day, you set yourself up for bingeing come dinnertime, Ochner says.
Fletcherizing Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
“Nature will castigate those who don’t masticate,” claimed Dr. Horace Fletcher, founder of one of the first-ever fad diets. This Victorian-era doctor one-upped your mom by not only telling you to chew your food but to chew each bite 100 times. Even liquids had to be chewed, or “masticated,” to properly mix with the saliva.
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Some of Fletcher’s ideas were ahead of their time — like being sure of exactly what’s in your food before eating it. Others, like never eating while angry, worried, or sad, just seem strange. As if weight loss wasn’t enough, Fletcher even went so far as to claiming mastication would cause your bowel movements to smell better. These oddities weren’t enough to drive people away, however, as notables like Thomas Edison, Mark Twain, and John D. Rockefeller gave the diet a try.
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The fletcherizing diet could very well lead to weight loss, because when your meals take you over an hour, you’ll never want to eat! Time and studies have shown us, though, that it’s more about what you eat than how you eat it. Fletcher didn’t really care what you ate as long as the “food swallowed itself.” However, we know that your body needs good, wholesome food; just eat it slowly.
Sleeping Beauty Diet
Sleep is great! It replenishes you, helps your memory, boosts your mood, and strengthens your immune system, in addition to causing weight loss. Ignore all those people who humble-brag about never sleeping. Soak in that slumber! Some dieters have gone off the deep end. Their plan: You only worry about hunger when you’re awake, right? So sleep all the time!
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This plan is dangerous. It recommends taking prescription medications to fall asleep for at least ten hours a day — sometimes up to 20. Hopefully I don’t need to tell you not to live on sedatives; overdose is a big risk. Elvis Presley supposedly tried the diet once and put himself into a coma because of it. We should all be huge proponents of sleep, but the recommended amount is 7-8 hours a day. Aim to stay in that range, and don’t veer too much outside. Your body will thank you for it.
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If you’re asleep, you’re not eating. Rumored to have been followed by Elvis Presley, this diet takes that simple fact to the extreme, encouraging people to use sedatives to stay asleep for days on end. However, sleeping the days away not only starves the body and causes muscle deterioration from a lack of movement, it actually risks death: “Every time you go under, there’s a risk,” Ochner says. “Sure, you might wake up two pounds lighter, but you might not wake up at all.”
Cotton Ball Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
We live in the information age. The internet has shaped the way we talk, think, communicate, and view the world. But in a million years, people will look back on the internet and say its biggest impact was the cotton ball diet. Born in chat rooms and on YouTube, the cotton ball diet is just like it sounds: you eat cotton balls. If you need unimportant stuff like “flavor” or “nutrition,” you can dip the cotton ball in juice or smoothies before swallowing it. The cotton ball is supposed to help you lose weight by making you feel full without taking in calories.
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The cons of the diet? Where to start… choking, for one. The cotton balls also block your digestive system, damage your organs, and dehydrate you. Never mind the fact that cotton balls are not actually made of cotton, but rather bleached polyester. The toxins from the synthetic materials could build up over time and severely damage your organs. Many supermodels have been rumored to rely on the cotton ball diet to stay slim. Sadly, many teenage (and younger) girls have supported the diet online. A lot of doctors link the diet to an eating disorder stemming from perverted conceptions of beauty.
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Consuming cotton balls soaked in orange juice — a diet technique may have been born on YouTube, in chat rooms and on Facebook — is an incredibly dangerous way to suppress your appetite. “This makes my eating-disorder therapy head spin,” Caspero says. Not only does consuming cotton balls in place of food deprive the body of nutrients, eating anything that isn’t actually food can cause blockages in your intestines. What’s more, most cotton balls aren’t even made of cotton — they’re composed of bleached, synthetic fibers.
Raw Food Diet
My weight-loss expert would agree that boosting your veggie and fruit intake while reducing the amount of junk you eat is a safe and effective way to lose weight, but this diet bans foods that have been cooked or processed in any way. Why? Raw foodies say cooking destroys nutrients. Though it’s true that cooking produce can sometimes reduce nutrient levels, cooked veggies still pack plenty of fiber, vitamins and minerals, and in some instances, cooking actually enhances nutrients while also killing bacteria.
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The biggest issue with this extreme form of veganism? Food prep — it’s totally impractical, says Christopher N. Ochner, Ph.D., director of research development and administration at the Mount Sinai Adolescent Health Center. Raw foodies spend hours upon hours juicing, blending, dehydrating, sprouting, germinating, cutting, chopping and re-hydrating.
Alkaline Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
The alkaline diet — also known as the alkaline ash diet and the alkaline acid diet — requires you cut out meat, dairy, sweets, caffeine, alcohol, artificial and processed foods and consume more fresh fruits and veggies, nuts and seeds. The diet certainly has positive points; it’s heavy on fresh produce and other healthy, satisfying foods. It does this while eliminating processed fare, which in itself may spur weight loss.
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Your body is incredibly efficient at keeping your pH levels where they need to be, so cutting out these foods really won’t affect your body’s pH, says Ochner. Not to mention there’s no research proving that pH affects your weight in the first place. The bottom line: The diet is strict, complicated and bans foods that can have a place in a healthy eating plan, such as meat, dairy and alcohol.
Blood Type Diet
Developed by naturopathic physician Peter D’Adamo, the Blood Type Diet is based on the notion that the foods you eat react chemically with your blood type. For example, on the diet, those with type O blood are to eat lean meats, vegetables and fruits, and avoid wheat and dairy. Meanwhile, type A dieters go vegetarian, and those with type B blood are supposed to avoid chicken, corn, wheat, tomatoes, peanuts and sesame seeds. However, there’s no scientific proof that your blood type affects weight loss. And depending on your blood type, the diet can be extremely restrictive.
Werewolf Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
Also called the lunar diet, this one is simply fasting according to the lunar calendar. Its quick-fix version involves a day of fasting allowing only water and juice during a full or new moon — and supposedly losing up to six pounds in water weight in a single day. The extended version starts with that daylong fast and continues with specific eating plans for each phase of the moon. While you’ll lose some weight from not eating, it has nothing to do with the moon, and it will come right back, Ochner says. Maybe next they’ll create the vampire diet and go for a more Dr, Jekyll and Mr. Hyde approach.
Five Bite Diet
Eat whatever you want — but only five bites of it. On this diet, developed by obesity doctor Alwin Lewis, M.D., you skip breakfast and eat only five bites of food for lunch and five more for dinner. “I’m OK with the idea of eating whatever you want in smaller portions, but you need to round out the rest of your eating with nutrient-dense foods to give your body the fuel it needs,” Caspero says. “On this diet, even if you take giant bites of heavily caloric food, you’re still barely consuming 900 to 1,000 calories a day.”
Master Cleanse/Lemonade Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
This diet has been around for decades, and there are a ton of variations. Pretty much all involve subsisting for days on only lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper mixed in water. “You are essentially just drinking diuretics,” Ochner says. “You’ll shed mostly water weight.” Once you start eating solid foods again, you will gain all the weight back. Common side effects include fatigue, nausea, dizziness and dehydration. Plus, on an extremely low-calorie diet like this one, you are going to lose muscle, exactly the kind of weight you don’t want to lose, Caspero says.
Baby Food Diet
If a baby can grow up eating the mushy stuff, eating some definitely won’t hurt you, but guess what: You aren’t a baby. Dieters replace breakfast and lunch with about 14 jars of baby food (most baby food jars contain 20 and 100 calories apiece), and then they eat a low-calorie dinner. It’s easy to get too few calories for your body to run its best, Ochner says. Besides, who really wants to take jars of baby food to work each day?
Cabbage Soup Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
The grandmother of all fad diets is right here, and why wouldn’t it be. The bulk of this plan is fat-free cabbage soup, which is eaten two to three times a day; this happens for a week. Along with this, you can consume other low-calorie foods like bananas and skim milk. In the short term, it does yield weight loss. It works because you are eating a low-calorie diet full of fiber and water to help aid in fullness; however, it’s just a quick fix diet. It can also promote bloating and gas from the cabbage and is lacking in protein. We all need a little protein, which is needed to preserve lean body mass. While there is nothing wrong with consuming nutrient-dense, low-calorie foods for weight loss, it should be balanced. Other foods such as fruits, carbohydrates, healthy fats and lean protein are quite useful.
Grapefruit Diet
We are all for including produce at every meal, but the various versions of this 80-year-old fad diet instruct dieters to focus all of their meals on grapefruit or grapefruit juice, claiming that the fruit contains fat-busting enzymes that will help dieters lose 10-plus pounds in 12 days. “In reality, any time you are following a very-low calorie diet you will lose weight,” Caspero says. And this diet definitely hits that, limiting dieters to 800 to 1,000 calories a day. Some iterations also prohibit eating extremely hot or extremely cold foods, preparing foods in aluminum pans, and requires dieters to space “protein meals” and “starch meals” at least four hours apart.
HCG Diet (The Worst Fad Diets)
This edge-of-starvation diet limits you to about 500 calories a day while taking human chorionic gonadotropin (HCG), a hormone that proponents tout as a powerful appetite suppressant. However, there’s no evidence that HCG does more than act as a placebo, Ochner says. Yes, you’ll lose weight, but only due to the extreme calorie restriction. Though a health care provider may legally give you HCG injections, they’re typically used to treat fertility issues in women and the FDA has not approved them for weight loss. As for over-the-counter homeopathic products that supposedly contain HCG? Those are illegal.
